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May 1, 2017

Wake Up and Be Awesome! Part 2

Wake Up and Be Awesome! Part 2

May 2017

In Wake Up and Be Awesome Part 1 we talked about how a Perceptive Focus can help us to wake up and be awesome! It is crucial to have a clear understanding of what specific actions and attitudes are necessary to help us achieve awesomeness. The more specific we are, the more precise the focus and the better the results.

Wake Up and Be Awesome Part 2 will focus on the strengths of optimistic conviction to become all we are capable of being. We will need optimistic conviction to overcome the naysayers in our world.

Unfortunately, many of us have had the experience of being in the presence of a naysayer. Sometimes the naysayer may even be a close friend or family member. Think of the last time you were excited to challenge yourself to raise the bar. You decided to share the news with someone you trusted only to have your spirits dampened by their discouraging words.

I remember confiding in a close friend when I had decided to write my first book. She informed me that I was not capable of writing a book because my writing skills weren’t good enough. After all, who was I to assume that I could attempt such a feat? She was highly educated, (more highly than I was), and even she wouldn’t consider such a feat. She remarked that even if I did happen to write something how would I possibly edit, publish and print? I am happy to say I did not heed her words. I have written two books since that conversation, Rise & Shine! and TA-DAH! which are going on 2nd and 3rd printings. I am currently pondering topics for a third book. I have a goal of writing at least five books in my lifetime.

We can’t let the naysayers in the world stop us from striving for excellence. Just imagine if we did how different our world would be today. For example, Walt Disney was called a dreamer and was told he couldn’t and shouldn’t attempt his dreams. Disney Land has been thriving since July of 1955, Disney World since October 1971 and between the two, now have over 90,000 visitors per day. Thomas Edison made 1,000 unsuccessful attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, “How did it feel to fail 1,000 times?” Edison replied, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.” Henry Ford went bankrupt twice before he achieved success on his third attempt. Amelia Earhart became the first woman to fly across the Atlantic Ocean in June of 1928. I presume she received a great deal of negative push back on her journey. Imagine how many awesome achievements would have not been accomplished if the strivers of the world allowed discouraging words and fear of failing to stop them.

 

 

Optimistic Conviction – The dictionary defines Optimistic as expecting a favorable view of events or conditions and outcome and Conviction as a fixed or firm belief. We will need an optimistic conviction in order to continually strive to be our best in the face of adversity. Throughout our journey, we will encounter dissuasion from naysayers and discouragement from failures. It is the firm belief that we can succeed that will allow us to become all we are capable of being!

I have had failures in my life. What’s ironic is those failures have often turned out to open new doors and set me up for even greater successes. At the very least, I have grown as a result of those failures. Think about experiences you have had in your past that you labeled as bad, negative or even failures. Did any of those experiences open a new door for you? Maybe you had a difficult move or change in job or even a divorce that was scary and difficult at the time. However, in the end, it allowed you to be free to strive for much more. We really won’t know whether something was a positive or negative in our life until we are ready to take our last breath.

Tune in next month for Wake Up and Be Awesome! Part 3

March 30, 2017

Wake Up and Be Awesome! Part 1

Wake Up and Be Awesome!  Part 1

April 2017

I have the privilege of coaching dental teams nationwide. A recent conversation with a leadership team about their progress since our Culture Camp prompted me to write this article. During our conversation, the doctor made the statement; “It’s not easy showing up being who you want to be every day!” Such a profound and true statement!

Showing up being the person we desire to be isn’t easy! It requires a daily quest to wake up and be awesome! It means not just responding or reacting to circumstances or people based on how we feel in the moment. Instead, it necessitates making mindful choices that support our end goal of becoming the person we strive to be.

It never ceases to amaze me how many people willingly settle for average or status quo in their personal and their professional lives, yet are quick to judge others for wanting to strive for awesomeness. They consider themselves “rational realists”. I refer to them as the naysayers of the world. The word “can’t” is the foundation of their outlook and vocabulary. They often look down their noses with disdain and think of strivers as dreamers who are impractical and unrealistic.

I feel sad for the naysayers of the world. Their negativity is often fueled by a lack of belief in themselves. That negativity stops them from going after what they want in life and from being the most awesome they can be. Therefore, if they can’t or won’t be awesome, someone else shouldn’t or couldn’t possibly be.

 

 

Choosing to continue to strive – to wake up and be awesome every day, takes specific character strengths: The strengths of perceptive focus, optimistic conviction and passionate perseverance to become all we are capable of being. This month we will address Perceptive Focus!

Perceptive Focus – The dictionary defines Perceptive as having or showing keenness of insight, understanding, or intuition, and Focus as a central point, as of attraction, attention, or activity. When striving to wake up and be awesome, it is crucial to have a clear understanding of what specific actions and attitudes are necessary to help us achieve awesomeness. The more specific we are, the more precise the focus and the better the results. Once we have defined those qualities, it is imperative to give them our full attention daily.

Let’s say your goal is to be a more positive person. It is too general and vague to just declare that you want to be a more positive person. It is important to define specific actions and attitudes a positive person would exemplify.

For example, you might say that being a more positive person would mean that you:

  • smile at others
  • focus on what you can do rather than what you can’t
  • speak positively of others
  • show appreciation with a genuine compliment
  • practice gratitude by saying thank you more often

I would choose at least three and no more than five actions to practice daily. Now you have a tangible daily action plan you can focus your attention on to help you become a more positive person. You can measure how you did by reviewing your day. Did you smile at everyone you encountered today? Did you focus on what you can do versus what you can’t? Did you speak positively of others? Did you genuinely compliment others? Did you say thank you? Practice your actions daily until they become en-grained into a habit (which takes approximately 66 days). Once an action becomes a habit, add a new action step to your daily routine to continue to raise the bar.

 

Tune in next month for Wake Up and Be Awesome! Part 2

March 1, 2017

C.L.E.A.R. Leadership! (Part 2)

C.L.E.A.R. Leadership! (Part 2)

There are 5 leadership fundamentals that help to clarify leadership. The acronym C.L.E.A.R. exemplifies these 5 fundamentals. This month we will cover the final two C.L.E.A.R. Leadership fundamentals. Please refer to February’s message to review the first three fundamentals.

C – Core Standards

L – Live by Example

E – Empowerment

A – Accountability

R – Results

 

Accountability –   C.L.E.A.R. Leadership is dependent on leaders being responsible and accountable! It means consistently doing what they said, when they said, and how they said they would do it. It means holding everyone equally accountable. No exclusions no exceptions or you divide the team and lose trust. Also no deviations for team members regardless of longevity.  Accountability does not mean telling someone something once. It means delegating clear expectations and following up as needed until completion is confirmed. Accountability means never leaving anything up to assumptions. When we commit to something we hold ourselves accountable to delivering what we promised.

Here is how we often lose trust with accountability. Someone asks us to do a task for them. We take it on and promise to complete by a certain date and time. Usually we think of what is the fastest could we get it done (if everything went perfect) and we commit to that time frame. Walla…life gets in the way and we don’t get it done on time. When we don’t do what we said we would do when we said we would do it we instantly lose trust. I don’t know about you but very seldom does everything go perfect in my life.

I have found it works best to think of what would be the worst case scenario for timing. For example I am often asked to write articles for different Dental Publications. If I know I can have it done in a week if everything goes smooth I will ask if I can have two weeks. In most cases it doesn’t matter to the publisher. I finish and submit my article in 10 days and I look like a super star! The key is to under promise and over deliver. The problem is our society has become just the opposite…over promising and under delivering. Just think about the solicitation and advertising you hear.   How often do you hear ridiculous claims? Do you instantly trust…or have you gotten jaded by so many negative past experiences?

Life happens and sometimes even with our best efforts we can’t fulfill our promises. In order not to damage trust keep people in the loop by communicating in a timely manner what you can do.

 

 

Results – It is important to have an end goal in mind in order to get results. Otherwise, if you don’t know what you want to achieve how do you know when you’ve arrived? It’s very difficult to lead others when they are unsure of the results you desire. Clearly define the results you want to achieve. The more focused the result the clearer the strategy becomes to achieve success. What will make the biggest impact in achieving your desired results?

Establish the why behind the results desired. What are the benefits if the results are achieved and the consequences if they are not? Identifying the why is what gives us the purpose and the perseverance to keep going even when we hit obstacles and meet resistance. It is important for the why to be a value of eight or above on a scale of one to ten. Otherwise, you increase the risk of losing motivation and not succeeding.

Set trackable benchmarks that are challenging and yet achievable. Monitor your progress daily, weekly, monthly etc. depending on the benchmark. When you aren’t achieving a benchmark take time to uncover the specific area(s) of concern. Where do you need to focus more time and energy? What can you start doing or what can you stop doing to make the biggest impact? What specific action steps do you need to take to get the results you desire?

Practice C.L.E.A.R. Leadership and lead in life!

February 1, 2017

C.L.E.A.R. Leadership! (Part 1)

C.L.E.A.R. Leadership! (Part 1)

Leadership can be confusing and frustrating. It’s why many people shy away from leadership roles. However, regardless of our position in life, whether we want to or not, we all lead in life. The problem for many of us is we don’t really think that we have what it takes to be a great leader or even a good one for that matter. We often mystify leadership by associating it with legendary people. We start to believe leadership is insurmountable and something only the famous or really brave people can do.

I have the privilege and honor of coaching and speaking nationally and internationally. What I have found is when I ask my audience to share who is or was a great leader in their life and why they are quick to respond. This exercise really helps to demystify leadership fundamentals. There are 5 clear leadership fundamentals that consistently show up. The acronym C.L.E.A.R. exemplifies the 5 fundamentals.

C – Core Standards

L – Live by Example

E – Empowerment

A – Accountability

R – Results

This month’s message will focus the first 3 of the 5 fundamentals.

Core Standards – C.L.E.A.R. Leadership starts with clear core standards. It’s very difficult to get others to follow our lead if we don’t even know who we are and what we stand for.   What 4 words in order of priority describe your core values? Would other people be able to recognize those values in you?

For example, my 4 core words in order of priority are: Lifter, Authentic, Happy, and Committed. If you don’t know what yours are stop reading and take some time to reflect. They are important to know because they will help guide us in our decision making. Defining and living by our core values will help us avoid the distractions of the daily mundane and other people’s shoulds. They will also help us have a strategy for who we want to show up as every day. Core values become our blue print on how to live. Every action or attitude is to be examined before proceeding. Does this action or attitude support my core values?   Which takes us to the second fundamental.

 

Live by Example – C.L.E.A.R. Leadership transpires when we live by example. In other words model the waddle you want to see! Only set standards that you are willing to support in attitude and actions. If you aren’t willing to support the standards others will follow your lead of not supporting as well.   Living by example is the strongest of all leadership fundamentals. It is what builds trust and inspires others to follow us into uncertain even dangerous situations.

For example firemen going into a burning building or soldiers into battle. If team members trust their leader(s) they will be more willing to step into the unpredictable and unknown and be open to change. Living by example takes willpower and a commitment to live each day aligned with our core standards even when we don’t feel like it. The more we live our life aligned with our core standards the more ingrained they become.

Knowing my number one core standard is to be a lifter has consistently helped me to respond based on who I want to be as a person instead of how I am feeling at the moment. The first question I asked myself in the heat of the moment is how would a lifter respond? This simple question has saved me many times from responding with anger or frustration.

 

Empowerment – C.L.E.A.R. Leadership involves empowering others to succeed. We empower others by being a lifter and lifting them up to shine! Lifters focus on helping others succeed. Not a one of us has gotten where we are today on our own. We have all received help from someone who inspired, encouraged, taught us, open doors and supported us. It is because of that mentor-ship that we are where we are today.

Lifters help their people to feel hope and learn skill sets that will help them be happier more successful. A lifter shares what they appreciate about the other person. They build up instead of tear down by focusing on the other person’s strengths. They have positive conversations with a minimum of a three to one ratio. Three positives for every one growth opportunity. Research shows that exceptional relationships have a five to one ratio. You may be thinking; what if I can’t find 5 positives. Every person has a least 5 strengths you can highlight! We discover strengths when we shift our focus from weaknesses to strengths. How ironic that our strengths are just taken for granted and minimized whereas our weaknesses are highlighted.

I like you take a moment and think about who lifted you up in life. Who was there for you to help you when you had fallen? Who open doors when they were all closed sometimes even locked? Who believed in you enough to help you believe you could take the first step in reaching your dreams?

Empowerment can change the world!

Tune in next month to read Part 2 of C.L.E.A.R. Leadership!

December 1, 2016

O.R.A.N.G.E. Power!

The color Orange has great power! We get happier when are surrounded with the color orange. My husband Steve, teases me about living in an orange bubble of happiness and positive energy. Those of you who know me know that the color orange plays a big part in my life and my business brand.  So what is O.R.A.N.G.E. power?

Different colors generate different energy and emotions. The color orange creates feelings of happiness and positive energy! I surround myself with orange to inspire happiness and positive energy within. It also inspires happiness and positive energy in others. I travel almost weekly flying to coaching and speaking venues and spend a lot of time in airports. Whenever I wear an orange scarf or for that matter anything orange people seem to smile at me more often and even go out of their way to compliment on the color Orange. Recently when I was standing in line waiting to board, five different people walking by stopped and walked over to me in line to comment on my orange scarf. The man standing behind me asked if people always went out of their way to compliment me. I told him it only happens when I wear the color orange. A car service driver last week commented within the first couple minutes of our drive how happy he was to have an upbeat person in his car. I had not said a word other than hello but I was wearing an orange scarf. The color orange just makes people feel happier and more positive,

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November 1, 2016

Cultivating Accountability in Others!

Let’s face it cultivating accountability in others can seem like a daunting task. Just hearing the word accountability can give the majority of us an ugh feeling.  What usually pops into mind are the words babysitter or micro-manager from past failed attempts at trying to get others to be accountable.

Cultivating accountability in others is worth the effort! – Individual, team and practice performance all dwindle when there is a lack of accountability.  Without accountability, execution suffers.  Our performance deteriorates when we don’t hold ourselves accountable to getting work done well and on time. The more we let things slip the more acceptable it becomes to let them slip again.  A day becomes a week, a week a month and finally not at all.

For example exercising.  We start out committed and then make an excuse that we are to tired, to busy or to something to fit it in that day.  It becomes easier and easier to make excuses until finally we no longer need excuses we just stop exercising.

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October 3, 2016

Constructive Conversation

The words Constructive Criticism always make me cringe. There just doesn’t seem to be anything constructive about criticism. The dictionary defines criticism as the act of passing judgment as to the merits of qualities, values and abilities. I have yet to see where judging someone has helped to promote their further development and advancement or improve outcome. Instead, criticism comes across as judging, condemning or blaming and has negative effects such as employee shut down, lack of confidence and decline in performance. Yet employers and managers continue to utilize constructive criticism to promote employee growth and change. They continue to do so because of misconceptions about effectiveness and not out of maliciousness.

It’s time to transform the criticism part into a constructive conversation. A constructive conversation includes the following fundamentals and has two role players. The two role players are the Approacher and Approachee. The Approacher is the person conveying and enquiring and the Approachee is the person receiving and responding.

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August 1, 2016

How Can I Get My Team Motivated?

How Can I Get My Team Motivated?

August 2016

Trying to get someone else motivated is often a very confusing and frustrating mission.  I am often asked by dentists and managers, how can I get my team motivated? They are frustrated after trying a multitude of ideas including financial incentives and not seeing any change in behavior.

This may sound familiar to you?

We gave the team a bonus and they acted as if they were entitled to it…

We gave the team time off with pay and they didn’t show any appreciation…

We hosted a holiday party event for the entire team and their spouses and they complained…

We have the latest and greatest in technology, service and equipment and my team takes it for granted…

So if this is the norm…how do we get our team motivated?

The psychologist Fredrick Herzberg asked the same question in the 1950s and 60s as a means of understanding employee satisfaction. He set out to determine the effect of attitude on motivation, by asking people to describe situations where they felt really good, and really bad, about their jobs. What he found was that people who felt good about their jobs gave very different responses from the people who felt bad. Herzberg’s findings revealed that certain characteristics of a job are consistently related to job satisfaction, while different factors are associated with job dissatisfaction.

Factors of Satisfaction:

Achievement

Recognition

The work itself

Responsibility

Advancement

Growth

 

Factors of Dissatisfaction:

Company policies

Supervision

Relationship with supervisor and peers

Work conditions

Salary

Status

Security

The conclusion he drew is that job satisfaction and job dissatisfaction are not opposites.

For example, if you have a negative work environment, increasing someone’s wage or giving them a promotion will not make him or her satisfied. If you create a healthy work environment but do not provide members of your team with any of the satisfaction factors such as recognition, advancement or growth; the work they’re doing will still not be satisfying.

People are motivated by interesting work, challenge, and increasing responsibility. These intrinsic factors answer people’s deep-seated need for growth and achievement. In a nutshell dissatisfaction can demotivate but removing the source of dissatisfaction will not motivate. It takes satisfaction to motivate someone to work harder or smarter.

Herzberg’s work influenced a generation of doctors and managers yet his conclusions don’t seem to have changed the American workplace. Compensation and incentive packages are still considered the number one way to motivate.

Job satisfaction happens when we shift the emphasis from output to impact. Instead of how many crowns have we done or how many patients have we seen today…how have we have changed our patients’ lives today? Motivation comes from the daily work itself, a sense belonging, and constant reminders that what we do matters.

I think of motivation as the seat of a 3 legged stool.

The first leg – Be a Lifter:

We can either empower or unpower! Help your team develop skill sets. Show your team that you believe in them by allowing them to continue to grow and learn by taking on new tasks and new roles…EVEN if you can do it faster or better. Be a creator who creates versus a wallower who sees themselves as a victim. Model the waddle you want to see. Let them know that what they think and what they do matters!

The second leg – Be a Family. Show appreciation and acceptance for each person as an individual. Celebrate uniqueness instead of comparing. Get to know each other on a deeper level. What else do they care about? Give them a sense of belonging. Don’t’ we often claim we are all like a family? So treat each other like a caring, happy and healthy family would treat one another!

The third leg – Be on Purpose. Have a clear vision and mission that reinforces a larger purpose. Emphasize the positive impact of the work they do not just in the practice but in the lives of the patients. Clarify the main intention of your practice by defining priorities and it will help give the team a decision making strategy. As part of the daily huddle, mission and purpose can make even mundane tasks become significant!

Surprisingly money is not one of the legs. Money is often a factor of dissatisfaction when compensation is not adequate or fair. Money quickly loses its impact to motivate any sustained performance.

The bottom line is we all want to feel like we have a bigger purpose in life…that we make a difference… that we belong…that we matter! 

June 30, 2016

Cultivating a Culture by Design

Cultivating a Culture by Design!

July 2016

From the moment we step across the office threshold we become a part of the culture!  The dictionary defines culture as a way of life of a group of people–the behaviors, beliefs, values, and symbols that they accept, generally without thinking about them, and that are passed along by communication and behaviors. Every office culture is unique based on the culture they designed or allowed to happen by default. What we do and even what we don’t do creates our culture. If we aren’t cultivating a culture by design we will reap a culture by default.

I chose to use the word cultivate because of my farm upbringing and because it is a great analogy for how I work with teams. Cultivators are designed to disrupt the soil in careful patterns, sparing the crop plants but disrupting the weeds. Similarly I help teams cultivate their culture by maintaining what is good and positive while weeding out the weeds (adverse and negative). I am a culture cultivator! The focus of this message is cultivating a culture by design and references an article, “Five Performance and Accountability Standards to Help Your Team Soar,” that I wrote for the ADA’s 2015 book, “The ADA Practical Guide to Leading and Managing the Dental Team”.

Take a moment and think about your current office culture. Is there any drama, disorder or performance decline? Do any of the following team members and behaviors sound familiar?

The Drama Lover

Kelly makes mountains out of mole hills. Any schedule changes result in meltdowns. If Kelly is missing an instrument from her cassette, instead of just going and replacing it, she wastes time complaining to everyone. She often gossips about one co-worker to another. Kelly believes life doesn’t just happen, it happens to her! She always complains, whines, and criticizes co-workers, patients, family and, for that matter, anyone who crosses her path. Her ongoing drama lowers team morale and distracts everyone from focusing on the patients and the practice.

The Chaos Creator

Sam’s life is always in disarray. He’s almost always late and has an excuse. He overslept because the alarm clock stopped working and he didn’t have time to replace it. Or he didn’t allow adequate drive time because he didn’t check the weather or traffic. Or he was late dropping off the kids at school. Sam’s desk is a disaster, and he can’t find any of the charts or paperwork he needs when he needs them. He’s never prepared for meetings, and is always rushing around, stressed from trying to catch up. The team can no longer rely on him to do his job, and have lost trust and respect for him.

The Checked-out Employee

Georgia has been with the practice for 25 plus years. She was an exceptional employee the first 15 years, but her performance has been in a steady decline for the past ten. Georgia challenges any new ideas and refuses to adopt any change in standards or services. She often has an attitude of entitlement where she feels she deserves special treatment because of her longevity with the practice. She proudly describes herself as direct which really means she lacks a kindness/respect filter. What I refer to as cutting off at the knees. (If you cut someone off at the knees, you humiliate them, bully or force them to do what you want.) This makes others afraid to approach her. She may refuse to attend team functions, morning huddles or team meetings, and refuses to put in extra time in a crunch or do what she considers menial tasks. Her attitude and behavior affects the entire team’s performance level. The team starts to question why they have to adhere to standards if Georgia doesn’t.

If you recognize any of these employees or their poor behaviors…BREATHE…you’re not alone. Many offices struggle with undesirable behaviors – they are often unsure of what to do and don’t comprehend the toxic impact these behaviors can have on a practice. They affect communication, treatment acceptance, team work, work day enjoyment, stress levels, happiness, and more. Patient experience, team performance and the practice bottom line plummet. These behaviors are triggered and escalate from unclear and inconsistent expectations due to lack of culture standards.

Culture standards help eliminate the drama of who is right or wrong and get everyone rowing at a higher level on the same boat. Culture standards create clarity and structure. When there is clarity and structure the drama and confusion that often divides a team disappears. The opposite is true when there aren’t clear culture standards, assumptions, false expectations and differences of opinions run rampant. Every team member comes from a different background with unique and individual experiences. What they believe to be true is shaped by their personal experiences. These experiences create their personal truths, which is how they judge what is right and wrong. Drama, disorder and declining performance surface when there are different expectations of right and wrong due to lack of culture standards.

Have a team meeting to discuss what culture standards the team would like in their work environment. In essence, what will be the code of conduct for the practice? Create the standards together. Creating standards to work by creates clarity and helps the team to be accountable to a specific level of attitude, behavior and communication; the ABC’s of teamwork and performance.

Here are questions to ask the team that will help them create culture standards for the practice pertaining to attitude, behavior, and communication:

  • What makes them happy that they want to see more of – list it as a to do
  • What stresses them that they would like to stop – list what you can do to stop it – for example instead of stop gossiping, use support a gossip free culture
  • What can they do to impact their co-workers and patients in a more positive manner
  • How do they want the team to show up for work every day
  • How can they support each other more
  • How can they communicate more clearly, timely and positively with the team and patients

Once you have completed the culture standards list, print it, frame it and put it on display in your meeting room or wherever the team will see it most often. Review it at your team huddles and meetings, whenever you hire someone new and whenever someone’s behavior deems it necessary. It is important and necessary for the entire team including the doctor(s)to make a commitment to live and maintain the culture standards even when it is difficult or they don’t feel like it. If a team member chooses to not support the culture standards they are choosing to no longer be a part of that culture.

Cultivating a culture by design takes a commitment from the entire team to support and hold each other accountable to the culture standards!

April 1, 2016

They Don’t Care How Much You Know …4 Fundamentals To Show How Much You Care!

They Don’t Care How Much You Know …4 Fundamentals To Show How Much You Care!

You may have heard the phrase, “They don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care!” I am blessed to work with dental teams nationwide to help them cultivate a happier, healthier and higher performing culture while delivering care with more passion and fun! The care part can often be vague and confusing. I send teams surveys for feedback on where they feel they excel and where they would like to grow to assist me in customizing their workshop. Most team members score themselves high at delivering excellent care. Yet when I observe the team I often find the opposite to be true. I have found it often stems from a difference of opinion or understanding about the meaning of care! Which is why it is important for leadership (Doctor/Practice Administrator/Team Leads) to be on the same page and clearly define and model the waddle of what it means to deliver exceptional care in their office.

Here are four fundamentals to show our patients how much we care!

Know Them! It is necessary to get to know your patients on a meaningful level to deliver exceptional care. It starts with being aware of the patient’s needs and desires and being willing to do something to help them meet them. Caring is more than just being considerate, courteous or polite. It’s an entirely different level. It means being truly concerned for the wellbeing of other. It means taking time to have a conversation with our patient. Here are some examples of questions that can help us get to know our patients better.

  • How do you feel about coming to see a dentist?
  • What has been your past experience?
  • What are your goals and desires for your oral health?
  • What do you like most about your smile?
  • What would you change if you could change your smile by simply waving a magic wand?
  • What questions do you have about today’s appointment?
  • What can I do to make today’s experience better?

We can show we truly care when presenting treatment by:

  • Speaking slowly and clearly
  • Presenting in bite size pieces
  • Stopping data dumping
  • Comforting them if they have concerns or fears
  • Communicating on their level
  • Being and advocate instead of a sales person
  • Thanking them for being a patient

Don’t Judge! It is human nature to have our favorite patients that we go above and beyond in delivering care. We pick and choose who will be our favorites based on their worthiness defined by their behavior. We are in essence judging our patients! Sure, we will be courteous and polite, but before we go all out we judge their worthiness first. It’s as if they need to meet some kind of external standard we have set in our mind. Here are a few examples of external standards, we set: being tardy, quirky personality, uptight, anxious or upset. We treat them different and deliver a lower level of care than we do for the patients we consider our favorites…our V.I.P’s!

If we are truly going to care for someone we will look past the outward and go right to the heart. Instead of prejudging people before we get to know them; show genuine interest, regardless of circumstances and personality. When we sincerely care for people, we will always be a person with whom others feel comfortable. They will feel confident that we don’t have a hidden agenda and they will trust that we will listen to them without judging them.

Active listening is often the biggest validation to show that we care! Be an active listener by:

  • Making eye contact
  • Smiling at them
  • Being polite
  • Hearing them by focusing on what they are saying

Show Empathy! Empathy is essential if we want to show our patients we care. Sometimes it may seem hard to show empathy to patients who are displaying less than desirable behaviors. I am not suggesting we just fake it. Instead come from a real place by entering their world. Imagine what it feels like to walk in their shoes by asking yourself the following questions:

  • What would it take for me to act like that
  • Would I feel differently if it where my mom or dad (a family member) behaving this way
  • How would I feel if this was happening to me or I was in their circumstances

Any time we can imagine the situation from the other person’s point of view, we lower our own defenses and, in the process, defuse their anger. Imagination influences feelings and feelings are the source of desire. It makes our actions easy and natural and real when we desire to do something. Compassion, caring, comforting, and kindness – make up the bulk of adjectives linked to patient loyalty and rooted in one’s capacity for empathy. According to the Dictionary, “empathy” is “the ability to share in another’s emotions or feelings.” It is composed of two Greek words that mean “affection” and “feeling.” When our patents receive empathy, they feel loved and cared about.

Resolve Complications! Occasionally even the best teams have patient complications arise. It is important to address complications ASAP. Be mindful of the energy and attitude you are bringing to the conversation. Focus on coming from a place or mindset of curiosity, care and concern. It is never about proving you are right and they are wrong. We never win by making a patient wrong. Regardless of what the concern is start out by asking the patient, “How can I help you?” Then stop and listen to what they have to say. Please don’t try to feel in the blanks or be defensive. Once they have stopped speaking ask the next question. “May I have your permission to give you feedback?” This does several things. If the patient has not finished sharing their concerns they have the opportunity to let you know they have more. This stops us from stepping on their words. It also gets the patient ready to listen to our response. Regardless of what you are going to suggest respond by saying, “I can help you and this is how…!” Avoid responses starting with, “I can’t” or “I won’t” as they often generate an immediate defensive reaction from the patient. Our patients will feel we care when we utilize positive verbiage sharing what we can do versus what we can’t!

(If you would like to receive the white pages for Patient Communication Standards   please email me at JudyKay@PracticeSolutionsInc.net and write Patient Communication Standards in the subject line.)

The awesome part is that when we take the time to show our patients we truly care about them…they will trust and respect us enough to say YES to accept our care!

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